Friday, August 8, 2008

it's hard to be positive when things just seem to keep on going wrong

So another day and yet what appears to be another problem. My brother had an mri which revealed that his gall bladder now has to come out too, which was going to be done as an emergency surgery, then the docs decided to do it when they do the reversal surgery in the future; however, neither of these events can take place until the infection that is still growing inside of him clears up. They drained it again today and he's still on meds for it, but it just doesn't seem to want to go away. Since he can't eat once again unfortunately he got put on a feeding tube tonight. I hate how bad things happen to good people, it just doesn't seem fair.

More craziness in the household right now too... I am currently trying to waste time as I anxiously await the arrival of my mom from Italy. She was on vacation with her best friend for two weeks and has been in flight today; however, my sis and I got word from my dad like 2 hrs ago that he was waiting for them at Logan and it seems their flight was diverted from London... due to storms in Boston they sent them to Maine instead. So my mom is now probably sitting in Bangor Airport biting her nails off, I'm sure she wants to get home so bad and it probably upset that she won't be in Boston early enough to visit Matt at the hospital, since visiting hours ended at eight.

As far as my day, I was in Paxton this morning until like 1 meeting with my colleagues and discussing our plan of attack for the upcoming school year. I am definitely excited to finally have a year when we're all working together. I've been teaching for four years now and it has yet to happen because others, well another, was unwilling to cooperate, so it really just made for an isolated classroom which I taught in. Don't get me wrong, I love my room and my kids, but I am thrilled to be able to open the door, switch kids, and really collaborate with our lessons.

After Paxton I was home for lunch and a little cleaning, I really wanted to make the house look nice and clean... I know my mom and dad are going to be physically and mentally exhausted when they finally get home later tonight (or who knows when?) so I don't want them to come home to a mess. Then I had some me time, I went to the gym for my work out, although lately I haven't had my usual desire to bang out a nice long run, instead, my head has been hurting in addition to my right knee, so I've been doing a lot of cross training every other day, and running on the days I don't cross train. Anyways, today I did the elliptical for like 1:20, then some situps and stretching. Sometimes that stretching is the best time, I feel fatigued and my body feels like it's been used and I feel at peace too... a nice feeling to have.

Returning from the gym was a return to reality when I learned about the feeding tube, but I had to continue with things to do, including grocery shopping, dinner making, showering, and packing. Packing up my room here has been strange. I have moved away to college, moved to Spain for a semester, but never moved to a residency of my own, all my own. A new address. My own couch and tv. For the first time I will be leaving here knowing that I can return if I have to, but hoping that I am finally independent and starting a new phase in my life.

Well if anyone is actually reading this, then I hope I don't bore you; however, I find this to be pretty helpful for me right about now... it's nice to reflect on the day and sort of put things in order and in perspective. Despite the many things that seem to be going wrong right now, it does make me grateful for the many things that are going right and for all of the support of others who have been there for my family helping us to get through it all.

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